A Simple, DIY, Hudson Valley Wedding - Picking The Flowers

Whew! It’s been awhile. I got caught up with actually planning and having my wedding! Now I’m back to tell you how it went and what I learned, starting with the flowers. :)

There are an incredible number of options when choosing wedding flowers (or you can choose not to have any). Do you want some for every table? Every person? Or just the bouquet for you? Which florist? What types of flowers? Colors? Are you going to preserve them? The questions go on and on!

If you have decided you want to have someone else design your flowers, you might want to skip the florists and go straight to a flower farm. There are several in the area with many options and some of them will design the flowers for you or know someone who will. This way, you also know your flowers grew locally, seasonally, and even organically depending on the farm. Shoving Leopard Farm even has an option where they grow a bed of flowers just for your wedding if you let them know by December.

For me, I went straight to the DIY approach to save money, and because I wanted a simple, casual feeling that is sometimes hard to find with florists, and in-season flowers were also important to me. I also turned out to be pretty good at it, if I do say so myself!

on the way to the venue! flowers are very distracting while driving, by the way. (photo by Thomm Quackenbush)

If you choose this approach, you still need to figure out where to get the flowers. You can look at flower farms like I mentioned before or look into bulk flower sellers online - this can be a bit pricey but you do end up having the largest number of flower options so you can be pickier about colors or if there’s a specific variety you just have to have.

photo by Daniel Evans

You can also try and grow your own flowers. I tried this and got mixed results, due to the weather and some fencing complications that pushed back when I planted my seedlings. I ended up not having nearly enough flowers by the wedding (I've got a ton now, though!) so I had to get some flowers from elsewhere. However, I did get a ton of pansies that I made ice cubes with that gave the water a slight cucumber taste while looking great, too! So that was a success, and having a few flowers I grew myself making a showing in my bouquet and the other arrangements meant a lot to me, so I’m super glad I tried - plus one of my dahlias finally blooming greeted me when I got back from our honeymoon.

photo by Daniel Evans

Another way you could go is to stop by a pick-your-own farm to pick some flowers. You could even make a day of it with your bridal party! This is the way I went when it turned out I didn't have enough flowers. Most places only charge around $10 for a bucket full of flowers and I only ended up spending around $40 in total. If you go this route, pick them as close to your event as possible and do your picking in the early morning or evening on a cloudy day for the best results. If you have access to a cooler, you might want to pop the flowers in there once you get them home. If not, a dark cool place would be fine. I only ended up putting my bouquet in the fridge once I made it to keep it fresh.

bottles actually used to be for clam juice!

Finally, you can just buy flowers from the grocery store. Some places like Sam’s Club will even have discounts on old flowers that might have a few bad stems, but are generally good. This way is probably the riskiest if you want specific flowers or colors, as they might only have a small selection - but if you’re just looking for roses and carnations or have a seasonal color palate (think oranges and reds around fall and pinks and yellows for spring) this might work out great for you

Now that you've got your flowers, how will you arrange them? There are a ton of great resources online for flower arranging, but, if you’re doing them all yourself, time will be a huge factor, so the simpler the better. For me, I started with my bouquet by simply working in a circle until I had about what I wanted and then taped it up with green floral tape and trimmed the stems. After that, you might want to use ribbons around the base, but I think it looks great even without that.

Next, I designed the table flowers. I used pasta sauce jars and other bottles that I had been saving up, and a few actual vases as well. These, I filled with flowers, generally keeping to a color scheme or feeling for each one. Finally, I used the flowers that were too short for anything else to make the boutonnieres. Those I did like the bouquet, just smaller. And you know what you can do with the extra flowers that just weren't quite good enough or got bent? Save them for the flower girl to throw!

photo by Daniel Evans

As for preserving your flowers, I don’t know much - I just took pictures then added them to my compost pile. Still you can look into drying the normal way ( hanging them upside down) or look into something more interesting, like freeze-drying. You might just want to keep a few flowers pressed in a book, too, especially if you do scrap-booking - all you have to do for that is place the flower in a book and then weigh it down until completely flat, and then wait.

Thanks for reading!

Amber

Photo by Jun Ogata dress by Holly Mccabe

A Simple, DIY, Hudson Valley Wedding - Intro

Flower and Spiral White Topaz Engagement Ring Set by Moonkisdesigns

To be honest, I've been planning my wedding to Thomm in my head for the past two years - and who can blame me? Weddings are gorgeous! Any excuse I have to look at wedding paraphernalia is good enough for me. But recently, we settled on a date and an engagement ring, so now I'm starting to get into the logistics of holding an actual wedding, which can be a bit overwhelming.

For those of you who don't know, the Hudson Valley is one of the most expensive places to get married. Pretty much anywhere around New York City has an average wedding cost of $30,000-$45,000, although most people get married for less than that, and the biggest weddings may throw off the scale. Chelsea Clinton's wedding in Rhinebeck cost 2 - 5 million, but another recent celebrity wedding between Kristen Bell and Dax Shephard only cost $142 including gas (this wasn't in the Hudson Valley, though). Still, no matter your price range, it's almost impossible to get around the fact that in weddings can be very expensive, both in time and money, and the little things add up fast. 

Wedding Shawl Bridal Accessory white ivory natural by MollysPurl

Now most advice you get on how to hold a "budget" wedding involves cutting your guest list, going off-season, only serving desserts, hors d'oeuvres, or breakfast for the reception. Most DIY books simply show you how to make cheap crafts rather than recommending creative ways to feed people, get them to dance, and get those photos shot. (However I did just read A Practical Wedding by Meg Keene and, aside from making me cry repeatedly, it goes into those sorts of things). On top of that, there’s ton of professionals telling you about the horrors of DIY and everyone from your family to complete strangers telling you what you need to make it a real wedding or how your guest won’t have any fun without a full bar. Some of those people do have your interests at heart, but others just like being bossy or want you to hire them.

Baroque Crystal Pendant Necklace, Silver by merryalchemybridal

So if you have your heart set on those 100+ people, having a wedding while it's still nice outside, and feeding people real food, what are you going to do? First of all, I recommend figuring out what is most important to you and putting most of your money to that. For me, it's going to be the wedding venue and possibly the videographer, but, after that, I'm going to have to work twice as hard (or possibly 4x) to figure out how to get the most bang for my buck. Like I said, it's a huge time expense but that's worth it to me. Luckily, as I'm an artist, I'm going to get creative! I hope I come up with some ideas you haven't thought of for your own wedding. 

Holidays White and Gold Ornate Dangle Earrings by pulpsushi

Once you've decided on what's most important , figure out approximately what your budget is. This number can be as loose or as tight as you want it, but it should have some bearing on reality, so get an idea how much your family, or their family, is (or isn’t) wiling to contribute, and how much you and your fiance can contribute as well. Now, if that number turns out to be way more then you expected, don’t just start throwing your money around for the wedding willy-nilly! Just because you have the money doesn’t mean you’ll want to spend all of it or that what you’re spending it on will be worth it the day of. Also, if you’re not careful, you might go over-budget, even if it seems like way more money than you could ever spend on one day. I’m sure your family will be pleased if you don’t spend it all, or you can always save it for the honeymoon! Now, if it’s less than you expected, don’t fret too much yet. It will work out somehow and worrying will just drive you crazy and then you might just end up over-spending on comfort food and cozy blankets to try and relax.

Blue Geek Men Tie Tack TC004 by GetGlassy

Finally, figure out what resources you have at your disposal. These aren’t just the objects you have that might help with decorating or serving your guests (though those help) but also includes any skills you and your friends have. These things might not actually save you money, but it will make things more personal and make your friends and family feel more involved. To do this, you really have to be the one to approach your friends and family. They may offer to help but you probably have a better idea of what you need. Most importantly, play to your helper’s strengths! If you have a friend who is awesome at baking, get them to bake something. Don’t ask them to help address invitations - that’s more of a job for someone with great handwriting. Keep in mind that, if you’rd asking someone to use a specialized skill, at least offer to pay for the materials they’ll use! This is especially true if they already are doing it professionally. You can ask how much they usually charge and they’ll probably offer to do it at a discount or for free as a wedding gift, but don’t expect it. They’re helping you out, so help them out as well. Also, you should be the one to bring up the money issue, as they might be too polite to and chances are you might forget when things start getting crazy later on, so they might have to remind you anyway. Although this might not save you much money, wouldn’t you rather show off a beautiful dress made by a friend than one picked up at a bridal salon? 

Dress by Holly Mccabe possibly available at Surviving Sisters' Boutique
 (Model: Amber Hawkinson, also Holly will be making my wedding dress)

Keep in mind items you can collect over time or borrow. For example, I already have a small collection of empty pasta jars I’ll be using as vases and my mom has a lovely white serving platter I intend to use for something. For this, you might just want to start keeping a list of things to ask to borrow later on, even if you’re not sure who would have it - you’d be surprised how many people have sound equipment sitting in their basements waiting to be used.

No matter what happens, whether things go exactly as planned or not, whether you spend hundreds or millions on the day, the important part is that you’re celebrating the love you have for one another and the uniting of a family of friends and relatives. Years later, you and your guests won’t be discussing how much they loved the deluxe porta-potty you sprung for, they’ll be telling stories about the toasts that were given, how much fun they had, and how the two of you just glowed while looking at one another.

~Amber - www.etsy.com/shop/amberhlynn

P.S. If any you guys out there have any wedding suggestions, feel free to leave a comment! We could use all the help we can get.

Silver Letterpress Thank You, set of 6 note cards by WishboneLetterpress